Thursday, 10 January 2013

Dance More

January 30th, 2012

The morning began with one of my new years resolutions to “dance more“, to the show tune “if I only had a brain.” from the wizard of Oz. Welcome to my world. I was clothed in  a sweatshirt and more if the truth be told. Red, well more like watermelon, with all the washings they get. I held in my hands a bowl of peanut butter oatmeal topped with pro-biotic yogurt. Joy is a personal thing and it too is on the list after more fun and after enthusiasm. I refused to watch the rest of  Mary Poppins the other day as the one song I did hear, about women suffragettes is stuck in my mind for all time.

In out hour is curtailed today as Murphy is not fond of the rainy freezing glop on the ground. Lucy is in high alert  as the 19 year whippet barked to go in. She stood at the open gate glancing at it, like I did not understand that it was time for a walk.

Just as I predicted, all the guests up and left at the same time. I will salt the front stairs when they are gone. In the meantime they lugged all their personal belongings down the salt free flight of steps. It would have been healthier if they had not shovelled, there would have been something to grip onto. Weeeeeeeeeeeeee I had cooked my oatmeal and wham! Off I went to jockey cars around. The stairs got salted. The walk way seemed to melt, but not the stairs to the house. Go figure.

I had been waiting for a week, to put on one of the beds “perfect luxury seven (count em) mattress zone topper. A two inch thick mattress topper which helps to reduce tossing and turning for a more restorative night’s sleep. It has 7 distinct zones that vary the levels of support to personalise comfort from head to toe. Premium polyurethane foam made primarily from petroleum based components.”  I ran up the stairs with the box that had been stored in the dining room, where else ?  The topper  was warehoused in its own petroleum based hefty bag and sticky tape. I worked the knife to release to life. It expanded like the universe. It comes with a page of instructions in three different languages.   This 4 diamond sleep rated baby from is supposed to aired to release the toxic residue, which I did not do as I like to kill my guests, saves on bad reviews.  It has a “convoluted (it clams)  pattern that creates channels of ventilation to improve airflow so that you sleep cooler.” Great, sweat calmly The three things in the instructions are AIR OUT BEFORE USE, DO NOT WET TO CLEAN, AND la PIECE DE RESIDUES, URETHANE IS FLAMMABLE. This gives the song “come on baby light my fire a whole new meaning” Wonder if they will take my own green status away.

At the same point in time I was watching the foam increase like my middle aged waist line, I polished the furniture with the orange smelling furniture polish.  I had anticipated polishing the fixtures during the snow storm, last night but somehow ran out of storm.  Little hint you can also polish the chrome of your car with it, or in my case bathroom fixtures. I left the door open to the room to air it out. Oh joy oh bliss. My sinus is now stuffed full of furniture polish mixture.

I also moved the furniture in all the chambers on the second floor, and vacuumed up all the prescription drugs people had forgotten take. While listening to the CBC go on about the new DSM 5 that is being published in the spring. The volume of psychiatric diagnostic started off as a list. The motivation to write the tome was the author’s mother was a patient of a Freudian. She received what the authored considered to be little if no assistance to get better. He thought he could do it help his mother with a list of enhanced diseases.  Hated Freud he did. (I do not make this stuff up.) All the while my mushroom of urethane is blossoming.  I understand it takes something like insanity to run a bed and breakfast but to stay in one? Must be some sort of wondrous  happening for individuals to forget medicines and prance out of here ok.    

Now I have to go and take the cardboard box that the four star topper came in downstairs to the basement to keep “just in case” I ever have to move it or me. The basement is full of cardboard boxes of things that have long moved on. But just in case I keep the containers.

While hauling out the wet laundry from the washing machine, I found a piece of plastic from the refrigerator that held a drawer shelf up. I usually put bags of milk on that drawer shelf. Can you replace just a drawer shelf? No I think not. One is supposed to purchase a new fridge. I need a new garage but that will just have to remain the way it is both until my fortunes improve, I am sure. But I have to say it did keep the bags of milk from running around the fridge. It is my own fault I should not have played football with the milk bags.

I received a phone call from my little sister. She is coming to help me eat the lasagne. How we are sisters’  heaven only knows, she has degrees in Math and a minor in Chemistry and can teach. I cannot add or subtract without the aide of a calculator and she would marry a man who can spell making it very intimidating to write letters before spell check. She arrives just before boot camp on Monday and leaves a week later. While she is here, I have to teach her how to drive a standard transmission as she drive a van. Just for fun. We could have gone someplace warm, like a beach down south, another one of my resolutions but she was determined to come and watch me sleep for the first laser treatment of the year. ( I have actually given up counting how many treatments I have had but it was every two weeks since August. Like one of those kids toys, that you blow up and punch and it bobs up again. I will check my loot ticket and maybe we can just climb on a plane and go south after all.)    I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much. ~Mother Teresa  Hugs


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